Wednesday, June 23, 2010

It's still Scotland's oil and Moore's Norway



So, the annual Gers report spells out what we should already all know about the potential value of Scotland's oil. Unfortunately, this wealth is still flowing into London's black hole and not into a Scottish trust fund, a la the wise Norwegians.

There is probably decades' worth of oil left. We could add that to our whisky revenue, renewable energy dividends, tourism cash etc... and then subtract what the UK wastes on WMDs, illegal wars and other occupations of third world countries, the Royal Family etc.

Labour's bum-chinned bampot Andy Kerr (a name originating in Gaelic which can be translated at 'wrong') says that its all crap and does his best to downplay the good news. Its become something of a tribal duty to denigrate Scotland or her potential whilst ignoring similar and successful nations such as Norway. It says much of Anndra Ceàrr that he would prefer a Britain under Tory rule than an independent Scotland that could possibly be under a more progressive Labour rule - assuming that an independent Scottish Labour party would return to some of its more progressive and traditional values.

Meanwhile, Kerr could do worse than view the out-take - 'Is Norway Utopia' - from Michael Moore's film Sicko in which he sheds light on the nature of Norwegian society. Would Andy Kerr really tell these Norwegians that they would be better off being ruled by Sweden again? Or even by London???

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Milestones and millionaires


Yesterday's 'milestone' of the 300th death in Afghanistan of the British occupiers was grim. It seems as if it's already been surpassed by another fatality. Mealy-moothed Cameron may praise their bravery, but is their sacrifice of any benefit to us? Can any of us - even your diehard Labour and Tory warmonger - honestly say that your average Scot is reaping the benefits of trying to contain a hornets nest of our own making?

Not only are we failing to defeat the Taleban/ Al Queda (flashback a few years and you could replace that with the USSR/ IRA) but 'we' are actively making enemies. Valleys of neutral or previously supportive tribesmen have often been bombed by mistake. This, like the British massacre on Bloody Sunday, has the effect of bolstering anti-US/ Brit resistance and creating it where none existed.

Meanwhile and despite this Orwellian permawar and the continuing effects of the recession, we see millionaire footballers at the World Cup pouting like spoilt bairns and throwing their pishpots at their managers. Worst offenders have been the French. Having exited the tournament only a few hours ago, I hope these Pop Idol excuses for footballers get a roasting on their return. England are little better, what with their daily whinging of being 'bored'! Millionaire duds, holed up in a luxury hotel, playing golf, giving TV interviews, watching their competitiors and yet getting 'bored'.

I look forward to England exiting at the hands of the Slovenians and then been posted to the shittiest and most hostile poverty ridden township you can find in South Africa to face real fkn 'boredom'.

Saturday, June 12, 2010

World Cup coverage - those wild colonial boys


Have you noticed that irritating and monotonous drone that imposes itself on the BBC and ITV World Cup coverage? Aye, it's the voice of the English commentators. Who put the colon in colonial? Was it Motty?!

The novelty of the first football World Cup to be held in the continent of 'Efrica' has seen the civilised ranks of England's finest sports journalists descend on the 'dark' continent. We have Eton hoodie and LibCon head-boy Dave Cameron forgetting his rugger days and crowing 'Come on England'. We have 'World Cup Motty' on Twitter. Hurrah! We have the numerous references to '66 and 'England Expects' has been heard more than once. We have reportage on the poverty of the townships, while well spoken white boys ask the locals 'How do you feel?'. We even have some 'token blecks' as reporters. We have little though on the 'British' Empire's role in creating the poverty though. And little, so far, on the violence that usually accompanies England' participation in tournaments.

The Beeb are perplexed by Anyone but England. It is often thought that the Celtic Nations' habit of supporting Anyone but England is down to jealousy and xenophobia. There may be some truth in that. But few people have any grudges with the English players or even your average English fan. However, as has been pointed out before, if it is legitimate for the English to complain about foreigners, why can't the Scots complain about the English and their domination of our politics, our media and even their often well-healed and obnoxious 400 000 settlers in Scotland? If England can regularly display their own hatred of... well, mostly everyone but especially Germany during football tournaments then why can't we express our tiredness at the arrogant and patronising nature of the English media?

What has been interesting has been the comments of some of the more progressive English voices. And I don't mean Sting or Billy Bragg. Anarchist agitator, journalist and former stand-up comedian Ian Bone reminds us on his blog...

"Last world cup when England lost to both France and Portugal there was rioting in the streets. Croydon has already drafted in riot cops for England match days so a defeat tomorrow by the USA should make Saturday night out a lively one. Watch them plastic chairs fly through the air.I wonder if it’s the same in Pyongyang?"

Riot? Aye, such has been the displeasure at England's demise in recent fitba tournaments that after one, a Scot in London wearing a Germany top was beaten to death and a Russian in Liverpool was stabbed to death as England's thugs thought he had a German accent. Sure, the Scot in a German top is provocative, but the death penalty for that? Maybe the English Defence League, BNP, UKIP et al have more liking for Sharia Law than they know? Did it really take an academic study to prove that most BNP voters had a low IQ?

If you get tired of England's Christian sudgers marching as to war, then you could do worse than read Ian Bone above or check out the Enemies of Reason which cuts through the boolshoit. Or else, open that bottle of Laphroaig Càirdeas at 57.3% and do some 'rhythmic African dancing' as seen repeatedly on the BBC to the Chomsky Allstars.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Anyone but Engerland


Partly due to my German better half, I'm supporting Germany. The other part wants nothing to do with the xenophobia, immigrant-phobia and disgusting Lib-Dem Conservatism that is gripping England at the moment. Partly also to the abuse my German partner and her clients received in a Fort William hotel from a party of middle-aged English tourists when the English refused to support their Euro neighbours. Funny that!

So, when England's media and their knuckleheided fans can bring themselves to celebrate the historic links between Germany and England, such as their common Anglo-Saxon tongue, patron saint, Royal Family and traditional habit of marching into other countries, I might bring myself to support them when they play anyone.